Some honesty!

Today I am 40 weeks pregnant. Here is a sentence I NEVER thought I would say. We are scheduled to induce Friday afternoon (January 8). Tomorrow is the actual due date, and my Doctor has told us he doesn't like to let his patients go longer than 1 week past due date. Justin is scheduled to go out of town on January 15th for 3 days. We didn't want to risk her coming on her own and him having to leave the next day. Neither of us could bear that.

Last week I neared an emotional breakdown. It was my fault really. I had built up the importance of Harper coming before the New year because of our insurance and the tax deduction. What I didnt realize is it got everyone else thinking about it so much they felt the need to call and text all the time to see if ANYTHING was going on. I got so wound up in the excitement and then the drama of trying to figure out who was going to stay where and who was coming when, once Harper did arrive, I stressed myself out and neared a first class pregnant breakdown. I HAD to get my perspective back. Which to me meant ignoring calls and turning my focus back to Harper and the fact that this event is about Her, Justin and I. In a sense I had to "visualize the finish line", " Keep my eyes on the prize". Its been hard to not allow myself to get physically worked up excited with everyone else. Instead for me it has become a quiet overflowing joy and peace. A very inward focused joy and peace. Like I need to keep in my mind Jesus and his role in this, Justin and Harper or else I will start to sink and fear will enter in.

That said. I am thrilled that our parents get to be grandparent and our siblings get to be aunts and uncles and we are blessed to have so many to share this event with. Between Justin and I, Harper will have 4 sets of grandparents, 5 Aunts and 2 uncles. Not to mention adoptive aunts, uncles and grandparents.

Next time Im on here ( weeks from now) I will be posting pictures and news! Pray for us over the next weeks!